You will never get laid...

Friday, July 27, 2007

Dear Michael Bay,

You suck.

I'm writing this letter to let you know that you can't make goddamn movies, hell even with a screenplay which is adapted. When I watch your little movie called 'The Rock', I was impressed with the good directing. Then, you let me down after creating 2 embarrassing ones, 'Armageddon' and 'Pearl Harbor'.

2. In 2006, Steven Spielberg said his company is producing a movie based on a classic cartoon series called 'Transformers'. Everyone went gaga over it and wonders who was the director. After a few months, the world finally knows who is it...and it's you. Message boards were quickly flooded with the news and some even /facepalm. But I keep saying to myself that Transformers is a movie with lots of action so you'll do a good job in it.

3. Sadly, you disappoint many of us. We were told that there was a lot of robots Vs. robots action and you lied! There was only 3 scenes and the final scene wasn't even good (What type of pacing was that?!). Furthermore, 3/4 of the movie is talking about how the humans are coping with their presence and I hate it when most fighting scenes were human Vs. robots.

4. Besides that, we do not want to see how our hero nailed a pretty girl. It's so silly to see this type of sub-plot when the main plot is about evil robots destroying Earth. It's like, "Oh noes, robots are taking over our planet! But first, I need to get the girl of my dreams!".

5. This one concerns me the most. This movie makes you looked like a racist. I was browsing through GameFAQs' movie message board and there was talking about the role of the black people in the movie. It seems the black people was there as a comic relief. Like the fat black guy and Jazz. When all robots are just like a typical robot, Jazz is totally different. He sounds and acts like a black! Now, that was very insulting since the Jamaicans' impressions toward Jar Jar Binks.

I hope this letter will make you change the way you direct. We do not want to see anymore one dimensional characters and mindless action. That's all for now. Screw you.

Yours sincerely,
/d/

P.S: The masturbate joke was really random. Good job on that.

@ 4:10 AM

Thursday, July 5, 2007

The Big Annoying Topic of Irritation

I'll be ranting for a bit about nothing. But really EVERYTHING. This isn't an ordinary wall o' text rant, but more a collection of mini-rants concerning everything I find annoying. Read, add-on, comment, I don't mind.

Things that I find annoying:
- music crap that has a chorus which is 1 line repeated SIXTEEN TIMES, no change in tone blah blah blah I remember why I don't listen to it.
- raisins in bread as I need to pick out those tiny size 'delicacy'
- movies that I really want to watch but it's rated 18+
- when I level up in Maple, I need to train back to 100% to level again
- crappy Internet speed
- losing my stationary stuffs which I just bought few days before
- nose blocking
- the fact that I still don't own any next-gen consoles, or a good computer.
- "Wrong number" phone calls received and dialled
- food which is either too sweet or too salty and too hot or too cold
- height contest >_>
- Jian Yong's nonsensical questions
- people waving/saying Hi at me (The reason why I don't 'hi' at people is because I set my 'hi' limit to 2 people per day. The lucky ones 'hi' first.
- how I want to get free food but always fail
- Every time I want to fart, it's always be at a public place. (Don't expect me to go to toilet to fart >_>)
- When TV shows gets very exciting when SUDDENLY commercial starts rolling
- People calling me 'Dicky'
- Cashiers asking me, "Got X sen?". Look, I will give your X send if I GOT the X sen.
- Second place
- Stupid people doing smart stuffs
- Smart people doing stupid stuffs (Which usually isn't annoying but fun to laugh at)
- Mornings
- People losing their stuffs (Seriously, if you often lose items, I recommend not buying ANYTHING)
- Headaaaaaaaaches
- Big blockbuster movies which failed to impress me
- People who use internet slangs IRL (especially the person who keep saying 'swt')

That it's all for now. I'll add some more in the foreseeable future, probably.

@ 5:29 AM

Sunday, July 1, 2007

Bad Boys 2 + Shaun of the Dead creators = Great Success!

After watching Shaun of the Dead early this year on the Internet (didn't know of this movie until Dec 2006), I was quite hyped with Hot Fuzz. The movie's plot is about a superb policeman, Nick Frost, gets promoted and shift into a country village. When he joins the village, strange accidents happen.

See the connection?

The beginning was quite dragging but they put in some funny scenes. The real highlight of the movie was the last 30 minutes. It was all pure action. I kept on laughing until the end. Example, Nick was running and gave a flying kick to an old lady to the face! And the old lady was the bad guys. Besides that, the main antagonist in the movie is an ex-Bond! The murder scenes is a little graphic but quite funny.

The bad thing of the movie is...*sigh* I bought it at the pirated store. Yes, I do hate pirates but I gotta see this movie after the stupid censors gave it a 18 SG rating. There's like a few F words and no nudity. Sunshine gets a U even though a dude says "I fucked up" repeatedly. WTF?!.

Now I only wished that a teacher would bring my class to the school's theater and watch this movie. Where's Mr. Joseph when I need him?
P.S: Does anybody know who sing in the Visit England ad? I doubt anyone knew.

@ 3:12 AM